Lou
We've been together for several years. My partner knows I enjoy wearing diapers. We can talk about it, I keep my things at home, and there's no rule that I have to pretend this part of me doesn't exist. They don't want to wear them or take on an ABDL role with me. That has been their answer throughout. I thought I had accepted that quite easily. Then I caught myself showing them another cute print, or mentioning another couple I'd seen online, and waiting for a different reaction. I wasn't asking directly, but I was hoping. My partner noticed before I did. We had a slightly awkward conversation about it over dinner. I said I sometimes felt lonely with this interest. They said they understood, but also felt as though being kind about it had become an audition for eventually participating. That stung because I could see why it felt that way. We've settled into something more comfortable since. If I want to talk about diapers, I ask whether they're in the mood for that conversation. Sometimes they are curious. Sometimes they would rather tell me about their day. I also spend more time talking to other ABDL adults, with the same relationship boundaries we'd have around any friendship. There are still evenings when I'd love us to share this. I'm not going to pretend that feeling has vanished. But I don't want my partner to keep defending an answer they already gave me. And I like our life together: the unfinished jigsaw on the table, their terrible parking, the way they remember which bread I like. I'm interested in hearing from people who've lived with this difference for a while. What helped you stop quietly waiting for your partner to change their mind?